| the getting over it |
[20 Jul 2007|03:01am] |
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mood |
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 dead |
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i want to know if your here for me or the show are you waiting for a change or for yourself cause im here to wallow in my self pity ive tried "the getting over it" and look where its gotten me no where fast home is the closest place with a bed in it i begged and now i take cause you only make mistakes if you admit your wrong how can i pull it if im already dead the triggers failed and im in over my head i stop breathing long ago holding my breath seems to be what im good at i put my faith in people who only let me down and i fall for it your to nice and thats a bad thing or so im told im waiting for a sense of mind where everything is right not wrong if you want to make it in high school kill if you want to make it in live die trust me i never lie ;) its ironic if you ask me. me myself and i we're all here im an alcoholic myself is a pothead and me wants nothing to do with both of them david was right and i was wrong mistakes are not for me ill blame you while the world blames me ill sleep when im dead for now running isnt aloud tell me your secrets so i can tell everyone people think im not listing but there in for a surprise revenge come as karma and karma is a 2x4 in my hand so leave it all behind forget me while i remember go on and live our life while i drink mind away cause pain hurts more then irony and the alcoholic dosent fall far from the tree goodnight 536 i cant say what i want swdqccervq rttbr rcsaed
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| the air is thin in here |
[18 Jul 2007|02:53am] |
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so lets see what i can come up with now we all fall down so why is getting up so hard why did it take nearly 3 years to master something that should of taken a day no one knows it only hurts if we let it true love is about as true as my father come x-mas time and silences breaks the ice for once and where life almost makes a little sense on the other side (of hell) this is what i was fighting for i bite these nail till they bleed a bleeding heart is not wroth the pain i want to save my life but i cant im just waiting hick town to inner city's life is in need of a beat with a heart as my slows to a rate of not meaning but we live on in the hearts we break and the souls we take close your eyes so you dont see the mess its a little bloody when wet goodnight 536 kim knows nothing ;)
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| tomorrow is far from here |
[04 Jun 2007|04:00am] |
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mood |
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waiting |
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everyone thinks they know who i am. a lifeless crops with love in the mind. dont judge my book by its cover, read what you can and try to understand. these words mean something to me and thats all there is to say tomorrow is far from here and gone is on its way. you think i seek pity but what im really seeking is a real way to live. how can i please others if i cant even please my self. i dont see me anymore through these eyes just a look of misused life. goodnight hopefully ssldkfj3nrjlfkd 1'm fjknvs0rry 3y3 st111 10v3 u
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| hope is gone |
[12 May 2007|02:50am] |
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mood |
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crappy |
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i wonder if life means anything or if she knows how i really feel dout it tell me god why, why put me here when i'm in this state of mind to far away to help but close enough to watch i hope we can talk for hours tomorrow tonight i'm here for myself let see how thing go from here we are the truth we are the weak we are the hopeless we are what ever you make us out to be we are here and we will never fall for lies four letter ones to sum it up. make me out to what you see fit ill still be me and thats it abandon hope in a shelter that dosent belong. we are deader that a door nail. never able to relive our own lives i'm waiting for something to fall on to my plate i'll die before the storm even hits if loving me is wrong goddamn you do it right. im sorry FOR the hope you gave me i want to fall asleep but i'm afraid of my dreams and want awaits me so goodnight to you i'll be up for awhile longer to answer that question truthfully i love you i'll say goodnight cause goodbye hurts to much 536 :)
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[10 Apr 2007|04:04am] |
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my life is a sad story to you but that means nothing to me I do want sympathy so leave now ill meet you later right now we cant talk goodnight hhgrgjdfgggfedhbfsqnwrgfd
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| reason im here |
[05 Jan 2007|01:58am] |
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what's the real reason god put me here I need to know before I jump so when I meet him I can thank him for nothing I was put here for a reason just have to figure it out leave me to die before I can.
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| let me go tonight |
[17 Dec 2006|07:20am] |
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mood |
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heart broken |
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im in a losing fight with my self so what if beer help and you dont like that i dont care its mine and thats it im falling down and no one wants to help me to my feet im higher then ever and that means harder impact so wish me luck as i fall i'll take you with me i hope you drown in a pool of my blood listen careful as it rushes form my viens the bloods been spilt and im in not out let me die tonight im sorry you have to deal with me you are gone...... is my life a joke or do i just live with out you im crawling on to a death bed kill me please with a smile im 7 miles 2 empty if i sirvie ill live on inthis feeling history...,'....... theres no spel check tonight :) im drunk haha i love feeling awsnwsd aqwsqwedmqwsqwedaqwsqwednqwsqweddqwsqweda figuer that out
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| death before dishonor |
[14 Nov 2006|02:05am] |
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mood |
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}$;"'!*(%&*&@# |
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dont ever let pride get in the way of love ive asked a thousand questions and havent gotten one answer so where dose this leave me with another thousand unanswered questions do i even get another chance or am i out before the playoffs even start if thats the case then burn in hell while i die in my mind i will find away to win i wont go down without a fight is there away to erase this broken heart or do i have to live with it for the rest of my life i guess that answer is clear my dad use to say death before dishonor so ill leave you with a few words of wisdom we all fall and most of us are help back to our feet but have to do it by ourselves and others never try so live life and then die thats it goodnight :) IlJ2dm!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!! !!!!!!! :) :) :)
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[08 Nov 2006|04:47am] |
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FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK :) :) :)
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[08 Nov 2006|04:42am] |
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IM I READY FOR SOMETHING THAT I DID SEE COMING ITS HER SHE MAKES ME HAPPY BUT SHE DONT CARE SO WHAT EVERY I LOVE HER AND IT WILL NEVER MEAN ANYTHING TO HER WE'RE JUST FRIENDS I'VE HREAD THAT BEFORE FROM HER SO ILL LEAVE ITS OKAY IS IT OKAY TO LET HER GO OR SHOULD I STAY AND TRY TO WAIT FOR A TURN AROUND YOU CHOOSE I WONT. LOVE YA DDDDDDDDDDDD
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| "losing faith" |
[06 Nov 2006|03:51am] |
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mood |
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losing faith |
] |
okay . you can start of with a sorry and lead it into a one night stand . or you can listen to what i have to say . cause i dont want a pity fuck like last night . im losing a war to myself . and in return im losing faith and losing it fast . im tired of going to graveyards and wishing the flowers were for me . i hope my headstone says something nice . its just to bad ill never get to see it . end this with a bullet . and set me free with an act of god . give me a miracle and ill believe . give me nothing and ill have faith . i cant even take the easy way out . cause of a promise . and im losing an un winnable fight with life . in return im losing faith in me . and the man up stairs . if hes even listening is having the time of his life . this part is where i break down . and come to think of it . i did . you can cry on my shoulder at the funeral . ill be the one in the casket . sorry that one hurt you almost as much as you hurt me . we can blame my death on the drugs . that i never did . the alcohol is my fault . cause i did that . and one more time . im losing a war to myself . and in return im losing faith in me. goodnight 536 :) :)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i can do this all day but i wont :)
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| MY SUICIDAL REVENGE |
[05 Nov 2006|07:00am] |
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mood |
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a mood that can kill |
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im half way to dead with no signs of stopping im the loneliest person in this crowded room call my life so come and get it death collect this soul youve wanted for so long im through making promise i cant keep this is one ill have to break im sorry for the pain i caused i just dont deserve to be save you let this heart bleed for to long and this is my suicidal revenge dont take my words to heart i dont have to kill myself to get back at you i just have to kill the memories of us i dont have to be blind to see were a bust and oh yeah i dont need to jump to forget you!!!!just remember im doing fine without you and your love GOODBYE to YOU with love form my heart,
james :)
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| just jump |
[02 Nov 2006|03:20pm] |
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mood |
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crappy |
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just jump tonight
and lie awake
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[18 Oct 2006|11:58pm] |
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mood |
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dont want to be here |
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i need something more to keep me alive then this life i call mine own what joy it gives me to say i miss you but you dont care would you save yourself or would you save me are you to in to yourself to even see that im falling youll never know how i turely feel stab me in my back so you can taste my pain I WANT TO RIP YOUR HEART OUT (OF YOUR CHEST) die and bury yourself in the dark of night cause no one needs to know no one loves you and no one will care come on baby girl you know how i feel i need you to hear me out im tired of wanting to jump in front of a car just to see if hell stop hoping he dontdnight some much more to say but this was to much anyway so goodnight ps dont do drugs or die :)
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| tell me why again |
[13 Oct 2006|04:53am] |
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mood |
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cold |
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tell me why again why we must go though life wondering if its worth it to stay when not wanted and leave when most needed our failures show us our wrongs and mean nothing to those who it should mean everything to theres nothing we can do to save ourselves goodnight
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[02 Oct 2006|01:24am] |
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mood |
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no real mood |
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never again will i drink to the point were taking my life is okay and what away to go too 16 floors pretty high i know we can never be together again but i guess being friends is better then nothing so lets see whats happens ive i guess i learn something like when your heart falls out of your chest and hits the floor pick it up thats all you can do for now anyway bye :) :) :) ughfeyyufryeyeeghueueriulloveyytuwywyrwyuyouvheurwourjenhnfhjtu goodnight :) :) :)
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| happy with an un- in front of it |
[26 Aug 2006|03:29am] |
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mood |
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fuck a mood |
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you never said you hate me but you didnt have to i read it off your lips broken for to long ill pull myself together so i can fall apart all over again tell me how much sense that makes none so where should i go from here is there a place for me why couldnt they of killed me inside he didnt deserve it anymore then i did but he got to go i would of willingly took his place this pain is here to stay forever i wont breathe again today and maybe tomorrow too but i cant wake up from this nightmare i call my life go away,go away i just need some time alone which is a pertty bad idea but its the only one i got right now we could go aways away from here and never come back,never come back come on you know you want to little miss author of tomorrow she said i was vain and im alittle to under the bar if you know what i mean CHOKE ON THIS NOTE noooooooooooooo i wont let you back in to my life adam you know that i still love you like i love her care to take a second of your time ill give it back i dont know where or when and how but i will my head is killing me like never before i fall flat on my face to get someone like you insanely wrong for me to trust myself with a lie that i never committed i know why now NOW!!!! theres to much to say to you theres not enough hours in a day or enough days in a year to tell you exactly how i fell goodnight
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| fall for lies again |
[25 Aug 2006|04:41am] |
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mood |
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this sucks and im sorry 536 |
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nobody told me it would hurt this much it not fair way could they take me inside i would of been so happy to go its there fault id be better of dieing inside of being here a life was taken someone far from here but closer then you and me we'll never be important enough to change history but let me say that we can still change our lifes no matter what i wont fall for lies again i was stupid and in love but thats another story could you tell me why it fair to take a life form a family that needs that life more then ever i know it life well excuses me for saying FUCK LIFE AND FUCK YOU TOO this is bull shit and nobody see anything wrong with it but the ones who know who he was like me i wont fall for lies again and neither will they i dont have anything else to say so goodnight i love this song dldkfdeyedkjfasufoiloveksdfhueiruyoufjdnmijgtoiwervjenldkfjiwoefjndlkfafj:)(: 536
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| over it for good (kinda) |
[22 Aug 2006|03:11am] |
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okay i never said this wouldnt hurt its gunna hurt more then you know now lets get this started BLOOD DONT STAIN THE FLOOR we dont need you no more oh please bitch just have a heart attack and dont aspect us too take you back so what the fuck you gunna do theres nothing you can do thats life and love girl you make it hard to hate you but ill try even with a smile beg all you want it dont matter anymore hate me all you need to ill still love you thats the differences between ME and YOU (i know,i know)im to nice for you. you made that plain as day but what you dont know is i didnt lie but you dont believe me whatever its your lost this blood wont stain my floor for i cover it to well scars outline this "bloody mess" once called a heart bloody and now broken theres nothing left for me here what the fuck am i to do so i take the last choice i never wanted to call this revenge for all those days of waiting(for something that never came)its kinda hard to love you,right now but ya know i still do kill me tomorrow if i get to spend one more night with you if not then thats find too cause i dont need you to live anymore dont put words in my mouth i still miss you but i just came to grip with reality so untill to tomorrow i hope theres something in here that you can relate to just know theres tons of people that feel like you so this ones for you ps dont go blind and smile(:536:)
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| loves never fair |
[19 Aug 2006|03:54am] |
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mood |
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no ones there |
] |
is love ever fair not to the weak hearted nice gets you no where the girls always want the bad guy loves never fair simple minded could be worth the bull shit i put it all on myself accepting to much of her i was to much in love to see she needed space it sucks crying myself to sleep and waking with no one next to you loves not fair it never is enough to show her how much you love her evey day leads you thinking how much more can i take is today the day i kill the world im i ready for the kill of the century ill never let anyone in that close again she almost kill me and stole my heart at the same time i dont know whats worst loving someone that dont love you or knowing youll never get her back can you tell me how the fuck did i end up like this LOVES NEVER FAIR!!!!!!!!!! its to painful to even ever love again but never ever even needed to love in the first place come a little closer you can even cry on my shoulder but not for to long cause ive got to go see a girl who really cares dont come any more i wont be here for you cause you see me and her are in love and i dont want to be near temptation your words not mine i got to go and meet her now so so long for now and dont worry it wont last with you and him i mean just remember loves never fair no ones there any more so theres no reason to stay here goodnite 536 9m7 d9e 56v3
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